``I found myself going through so many things at one time that it got to the point where it was too much,'' said Marbury after shootaround yesterday morning as the Celtics prepared for Game 4 of their Eastern Conference semifinal series against Orlando.

``When it got to that point, I was like, `I got to get some help.' When I did, I got back to the place where I was able to pick myself back up.

``This girl told me, `Stephon, the hardest thing to do is pick yourself back up after you get hit by a Mack truck.' I was like, `Yeah, but [skeptics] don't understand it and they don't get it because they're not going through it. When they go through it, they have a better understanding.' I have a better understanding and know when people are going through it. I can see it.''

Marbury was born and raised in the Coney Island projects as one of seven children in a close-knit family. One of the most memorable moments in NBA draft history is seeing the Marbury family hug, tears streaming down their cheeks, after Stephon was drafted in 1996. Spike Lee's movie ``He Got Game'' was loosely based on Marbury's storybook rise from the projects.

The death of Williams hurt Marbury deeply since he taught Marbury and his brothers how to play Basketball and helped his community through the sport.

The death of Marbury's aunt devastated his mother, who, he says, has had six siblings die this decade. But when his father passed, it was the final push that caused him to become ``mentally ill.''

``I didn't even know I was mentally ill from all that I went through,'' Marbury said. ``I didn't know. I was just fighting through it every day. I just broke down and said, `I can't do this anymore. I need help.' You know when you need help? It's when you can't go to your mother or the people that love you unconditionally to talk to them about feeling better and getting your mind back.

``That's when I knew I was sick. I was mentally ill, man. I was like, `I got a problem.' ''

Despite some people close to him from Coney Island scoffing about it, Marbury decided to find help for grieving and ``a lot of different things going on.''

He said his first visit to the psychiatrist was shortly after his father died. He said he made sure he was open-minded because he wanted to feel better.

``When you grow up in the 'hood, you hear, `Man, you're going to a psychiatrist? You're crazy,' '' Marbury said. ``But wealthy people have been sending their kids to do that for years, whereas [the less fortunate] stay challenged in those areas where we can't excel at as adults. We see our struggles and people say, `Look, he's still doing the same thing.'

``When you get that help, you're so much more at peace with yourself because you know what's going on instead of fighting something where you know you need help on it. By me doing that, I was able to get my mind right, because when my Pops died, I didn't care about nothing. I was like, `If you haven't lost a parent, you're not going to understand that right now.' ''

Marbury says he is better now and still talks to his psychiatrist regularly on the phone and in person, when possible. The doctor also helped him deal with his tough situation with the Knicks, in which he was suspended for most of the season before being bought out of his $21 million contract before signing with the Celtics Feb. 27.

``It's important because when you're going through things that you've never been through before and you really didn't know how to handle them, there are people out there that are professionals who deal with cases like that,'' Marbury said.

Marbury said he has begun talking to underprivileged children. He said he has been aided in those efforts by New York-based Full Circle Confidential, a coaching and counseling resource for company executives and high-profile clients who are seeking privacy that is used by the NBA and also offers marital and family counseling.

``I basically want to talk to the kids and let them know that this does happen,'' Marbury said. ``You go through certain things and you don't know why you are going through them.''